Communication in a relationship lays foundation for strong, long-lasting and admirable love. Long-lasting relationships do not just happen, there are important aspects that fuel it. Key among them is communication. What is communication? It simply means the exchange of information, verbally, non-verbally, written, or otherwise. Communication in a relationship is as important as that love itself.
Towards Valentine’s Day of this year, my friend Andrew looked stressed at work. For some time, he could not concentrate on what he needed to do, and you could see him in frequent private calls which was not usual to him. At some point, I had to confront him to inquire about his progress in life. It was when I learned more about him. In our conversation, he introduced me to Betty, his wife, and a mother of two.
The two have been in a relationship for almost seven years. But throughout all those years Andrew never thought his relationship could develop some challenges to the point of ending. He took it casually by ignoring the little things, particularly communication. His wife on the other hand saw her husband as a don’t care person and she thought at some point he may have an affair with another woman.
Betty had resolved to move out of the relationship and stay alone. But the husband never knew such plans existed. It was at this point that I explained to my friend that there was a problem in communication between the two. The sweet words, plans, and other minor things that existed in the relationship were no longer shared between these love birds. I had to explain to Andrew why communication in a relationship is important.
Effective communication in a relationship, particularly that of lovers serves a lot of importance because:
Communication in a relationship creates a pathway to resolve conflicts
We cannot deny the fact that conflicts exist in several love relationships. To resolve them, you need effective communication. When conflict arises, we tend to react to the triggers without taking time to assess thoughts and feelings. Good communication in a relationship requires you to be curious about your partner’s feelings, responses, and reactions. It is when we express ourselves truthfully and deeply that we understand each other and solve conflicts that arise.
It fosters an understanding of the partner’s feelings
Each one in the relationship has their feelings. At times, such feelings may conflict with those of the partner, and you need to be aware of them. Where communication in a relationship works well, couples get clarity of the arguments, understanding, and feelings. Discussions become constructive and the triggers that create negative feelings are resolved without bitterness.
Helps create trust and intimacy
Trust in a relationship is essential. Have you seen how a relationship with no trust how it works? It’s pathetic, everyone does their things without informing their partner. Eventually, they break up. Trust creates intimacy. Being honest, vulnerable, and open helps build trust. For these to happen, you must have open discussions, and empathy and help each other develop that love feeling at any given point in a relationship.
Enable couples to respect each other’s boundary
When couples communicate their expectations and needs, they create understanding which helps create boundaries and set the right path. Understanding a partner’s boundaries is important in that you get to know the limit of tolerance. Without this understanding, it is very easy to step into the line of the other person which may create conflicts.
Couples become assertive, not aggressive
You will find that in several relationships, couples are more aggressive than assertive. Although this may not apply to all relationships, it results from broken communication patterns. When couples become assertive, they can express their needs and opinions with clarity and respect. Communication in a relationship requires assertiveness rather than aggressiveness. It’s the middle ground for being passive and aggressive.
When you become assertive, you avoid behavior that looks like it’s threatening, directive, or demanding. This creates opportunities to explore more in your partner which fosters deep connections.
For you to see your good relationship last as you vowed, embrace effective communication with your partner. Do not develop a tiring mentality on the status quo. Other options exist including but not limited to visiting professionals for advice.
